Everyone knows that September is the month in which most babies are born. Nine months after the Christmas/New Years holidays naturally, when everyone gets drunk and sleeps with people inappropriately. Of course, there is a moment in between the two which every person loathes: breaking the news. Now women back in the day were probably delighted they were pregnant as it meant they had a strong connection to that man who could then become her husband. I’m talking way back in the day, when all women had was their husband. Because she is so happy that she’s dug her way into a man, she wants to let him know as soon as possible, but it takes a while to figure out you’re pregnant. Considering these olden days had no period regulation via hormone pills their period could vary a fair bit and so it would take about six weeks before they were certain they were pregnant. What’s about six weeks after the year-end holidays? The mid-February’s loom, they do. So off she goes to tell her man and what does he do? He reluctantly celebrates the event and steps into “matrimonial bliss” via a romantic night of love and adoration. And thus Valentine’s Day was born.

Well it appears that thanks to advanced sound editing software, someone has managed to show that Neil Armstrong did in fact say One small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind.^[1] Well, this may not make me a hero among the grammarians of the world – or Armstrong himself, who still contests he said a man – but the beautiful parallel structure of the statement as it has stood nigh four decades is what makes the statement iconic. Grammar be damned, removing that a was one of the best audio glitches to grace mankind or man.